A mothers bond goes pretty deep. I think any mom can say that. A mom can feel a bond between her child right when she becomes pregnant. This last third pregnancy felt extra special to me because I knew it would be the last one to complete our family. Little did I know, how strong our bond would be. Baby Brantley came into this world two weeks earlier than expected. He immediately went into respiratory distress and had to be rushed to Pensacola Florida Nicu. That was an hour away from our home in Destin. So the moment my baby was born, my husband and I heard him cry, I saw him, kissed him, was so thankful he was ok, even though he was born two weeks early, and everything seemed fine. Within minutes there was something immediately wrong. I did not see him again until he was all hooked up to tubes, wires, and had a breathing tube inside a oxygen filled capsule like tank. It was the scariest thing I had ever seen. I could not touch him. He immediately had to be driven to Pensacola children’s hospital. I had to stay in the hospital because I had just had a c section and could not get up. It felt like a night mare I couldn’t wake up from. I made myself get up within a few hours and walk around to prove I was ok to be released early so I could drive with my husband to Pensacola to see our newborn baby. Looking back, I shouldn’t have been released from the hospital. I was in no condition to get up, never mind walk around, move or do anything. I was determined to see my baby and I knew the nurses could see it in my eyes I needed to leave. It was so hard to not see our other two children. Luckily, my sister in law drove to Florida to stay with our children so Travis and I could be wth our newborn baby boy and see exactly what was wrong with him. It was heart breaking to see him in that capsule like tube all hooked up to wires and tubes not being able too touch him. It was the scariest thing I had ever been through. The doctors told us, he was trying to breathe so hard, he blew a hole in his lung and it punctured. He was hooked up to a ventilator to help him breathe and they needed to do surgery on his little tiny lung to repair the hole. I honestly thought he was going to die. Travis and I immediately checked into a hotel to be with Brantley everyday. Right after his surgery, we were able to sit by his side everyday and watch him, talk to him and just be there. He normally would just sleep the whole time. One day, I knew I couldn’t touch him just yet but wanted him to know so badly I was there. I started to sing one day, very simply the ABC song. His eyes remained closed as I knew but I continued singing it. All of a sudden his eyes opened and looked right at me. Our eyes connected and I knew he could hear me and knew, he knew I was was his mama. His eyes stayed open glued on mine as I continued to sing. Travis came over and saw his eyes open. I walked around to the other side of him, and all of a sudden he moved his head and followed my voice to the other side I walked to. It was pretty amazing. I couldn’t believe it. I instantly started crying and knew he felt my presence and knew I was his my mother. I so badly wanted to scoop him right up, kiss him, hug him and tell him it was all ok but singing to him, I had hoped would make him feel so much better. I guess i didn’t realize how much he would sense me just after being born. From that day on for the next 9 days, I sang to him every singe day, a few times a day. Each time I sang to him, whether his eyes were open or closed, he would immediately open his eyes, look for me, and keep his eyes focused on me and not look away. It was mesmerizing to see his beautiful little blue eyes locked on mine I knew that was our thing. Or little bond we had while we were in the nicu. Once the day finally came I could hold him (which felt like an eternity) it was amazing. I remember just holding him all wrapped up in a blanket, crying and rocking him. I had to be careful because he was still all hooked up to tubes and wires. I still sing to him every chance I could. His turnaround was pretty much miraculous. He had chest surgery and within 9 days we left the hospital and brought him home on Labor Day 2016 to start our lives together. That bond is forever remembered and still is intact til this day. Brantley is very much attached at my hip and loves to be right on my chest, as close as he possibly can be. And I do not mind one bit. I cannot believe how fast this past year has gone by. I feel truly grateful he is the healthiest he possibly can he. He’s the happiest little ray of sunshine, always smiling and brings so much joy to our lives. Grampy would be so proud to see him today. Happy 1st Birthday peanut! We love you so much!